“Fear is the glue that keeps you stuck. Faith is the solvent that sets you free.”
― Shannon L. Alder
What do you do when you are stuck? Many of us go through periods of time in our lives when we feel like we are stuck in a rut, going nowhere on a treadmill, or trapped.
I believe that these seasons in our lives push us to pay attention to areas in our lives that need improvement or new direction. I can think of a handful of times over the course of my adulthood when I felt stuck, trapped, even hopeless.
Each time, I was able to trace my inability to MOVE to fear. Fear of change. Fear of disappointing others. Fear of the unknown. The list of fears are endless. But once I realized it was fear, I decided to focus on what I could control and let the rest go.
Once you decide to move forward, here are some helpful tips that I have used and shared with my clients:
- Rest period-Take some time off from trying to figure it out. Tip: Take a trip. Hang with friends. Read a novel. Netflix and chill.
- Reflect-Take time to reflect on your successes, lessons learned, and failures up to this point. Yes I said it-failures. We fail. We get fired. Our marriages end. Our businesses go under. We have to look in the mirror and tell the truth. Tip: Write in a journal. Blog. Vlog. Get feedback from a trusted expert.
- Responsibility-Take full responsibility for where you are and the choices that you’ve made. Tip: Don’t blame others. Focus on what you can control. Practice forgiving and letting go.
- Reconnect-Make a list of people who you ask for advice, confide in, or hang out with. Tip: Who do you allow in your inner circle? I teach my clients to write out a definition for who deserves to be in their inner circle. Here is one example: ‘My inner circle consists of people who want me to win no matter what with no strings attached.’ Once you define the terms of your inner circle, then set clear expectations and boundaries.
- Refocus– Take time to develop a personal strategic plan. Tip: Create a new dream board. Set new goals. Work on an action plan.
- Renew-Remember why you got started. Tip: Let your passion energize you and use your purpose to mobilize you.
“If you can’t figure out your purpose, figure out your passion. For your passion will lead you right into your purpose.”
—Bishop T.D. Jakes
- Recommit-Decide to go after your best life. Tip: Once you are back on course, stay focused, and take steps every day towards your dreams and goals!